This is why I’ll smile

Rocking out to: Epik High – 1 minute 1 second

This past weekend was my scheduled trip to Las Vegas to celebrate my 26th birthday, albeit one week prior to the actual date. I was pretty sure everyone would have a great time and was hoping it would go smoothly, as we know sometimes trips like this just become unprecedented disasters. Long story short, nothing really went ‘according to plan’ this trip. It was just one thing after another. I even had one of those ‘ah, f-ck this’ moments where I just wanted to throw everything out the window. I am very, very glad I didn’t. Everyone had an awesome experience and everything just worked itself out. Whatever you believe in, I truly believe there is another entity up there that is watching over us, and rewards us for our good deeds and intentions.

I am usually a mixed bag of emotions, although I try not to show them. I believe myself to be a very patient person who tries to put everyone else first before himself. Because of this I’m usually left catering to someone else while progressively getting more and more annoyed at my own tolerance and others lack of realization that I am getting annoyed. This trip would be no different. I would try to make everyone else happy, and also try to ensure I was satisfied as well. Impossible?  Most likely.

I also believe myself to be a very private person. I’m not very comfortable talking about my feelings, especially my feelings for a special lady in my life. This is probably why alcohol (especially Patron) was invented as a truth serum drink. Needless to say, once the entire crew arrived, the euphoric feeling was instantly there. Most of my closest friends and also some new ones, were all in one place for the next 2 nights for me. I’m used to doing things by myself (driving, eating, even walking), so having 14 other people with me was nothing short of amazing.  I don’t know if words would be enough to describe that feeling the first night, seeing as how I had been coerced to take 5 shots of patron, 3 beers, and double-fisting 7 and 7’s within about 2 hours time on an empty stomach. I honestly only remember bits and pieces from Friday night, but the one moment that stands out the most in my mind is sitting at the head of the table at the cafe while completely plastered. 14 friends at the table with me; chatting, joking, eating, drinking, laughing. I remember thinking to myself; “I’m not really sure what’s going on, but everyone seems like their having a blast.” Next thing I know, It’s 8am and I’m back in my room, hangover and all.

Saturday rolls around. The entire day I’m stuck with the lingering feeling that something is missing; something is not right. Dinner is usually my favorite part of the day, and even that felt like something was… lacking. Finally, later on, we’re all at XS at our original table which was way too small to fit 8 guys, everyone is drinking and we’re trying to make the best out of what was a total let down of a table reservation. Then the promoter comes over, offers to move us to the bed/table by the pool and this euphoric feeling starts to come over again. We move and instantly the mood of all 14 people has improved. What used to be a straight face is now a full-on, stupid looking grin. I could hardly believe that it played out this perfectly. In the end, everything worked out for everyone. At one point, while everyone else was socializing and drinking, I knelt down and thought to myself, “this is exactly the feeling  I have been looking for. All I wish for is for everyone to be together and having a great time. This is happiness to me. This is why I’ll smile.”

Sleepless in Seoul

I have been on a plane for 12 hours and have been waiting for a connecting flight for another 5 hours, only to find out that the connecting flight to Taipei was cancelled. Low and behold, our flight is rescheduled for tomorrow morning, and Korean Air is putting Mehul, Fong, and me up at a pretty nice hotel (Seoul Royal Hotel) in downtown Seoul. I read up on some hotel reviews, and this place gets solid ratings.

The first thing that crossed through my mind was, “wow, this almost works way too well.” We pretty much have a free trip to Korea since the airline is paying for our rooms and meals. Each of us has our own room. Talk about awesome!

So right now as I’m typing this I am sweaty, tired, and in need of alcohol. Seoul beware… cuz Fongie, Mehul, and Chang are here…

hate to love

Rockin’ out to: Brown Eyes – With Coffee

My family and family friends have been on my case over the past few months about my love life. It’s always, “do you have a girlfriend yet?”, or “when are you going to get a girlfriend?”. Really? I’m flattered that people care about my love life that much, but even I don’t care about it as much as they do. I’m taking it as I go. If I meet someone, or if someone already in my life happens to become that girl, then great. If she doesn’t come along, that sucks, but I’ve been alright on my own for so long, I’ll be fine… I think.

I’ll be the first to admit that there are times when I am with my ‘couple’ friends and I sometimes roll my eyes in frustration. I know that being single and being in a relationship has it’s own respective advantages and disadvantages, but you gotta admit, it’s kind of boring. Life is more fun with someone else in it.

I definitely need to change my outlook on love. For me, it feels like a chore, but a necessary one. I absolutely want to experience this love so many people rave about. But I hate it at the same time because it is so difficult to continuously micro-manage your relationship in an effort to keep it healthy. It’s almost like working another job.

All this being said, there is someone on my mind. I care about her very much, and I can only hope she cares about me the same way. Whether I will ever figure that out, only time will tell.

let’s bring it back

Jammin’ on: AI feat. EXILE – So Special (Version AI)

Hi everyone! It’s been quite a long hiatus for me, but I’m finally back. It’s mostly because of a friend’s influence that I feel like writing again, but it also may mean I’m becoming a little bit more emo… hopefully not. If anyone reads this at all, I’m very grateful that you take your time to read this. I think that’s why people write. We all like to claim we’re trying to let off steam, but it’s obvious in a public forum like this we want people to read our thoughts.

I hope I’m not the only one that says politics with a negative connotation. Everyone’s talking about the election, but in the end, are any of the candidates going to work for you? They may work for what their party believes in and their personal ideals (i.e. George Bush), but in the mean time all the small people that grant them their power get left behind. Also, it’s not even like McCain is the one running for president now. Sometimes, I even think Sarah Palin is the one running for pres., and everyone loves to criticize the Obama because of his… “lack of experience.” I don’t even think Obama should be president, although he would shake things up a bit. If all you needed to be president was to be rich and have lots of connections, then how many idiots would have been elected by now?

However, I don’t think we can really blame Bush and republicans for everything. Everyone fucked up over the last decade, no doubt. But the fact remains that the current Republican platform remains mostly ‘reactionary’, instead of being proactive. What did Bush do when the housing market started to crumble and bring down the world economy with it? He blamed Congress for not being able to agree on a bailout, even Republicans were pissed off at him. Really, when you look at the way the world is, one person can’t really do anything. But in retrospect, one person can do anything. Bring down a dictator one day, eat BBQ at his ranch in Texas the next. Shit… imagine if I could have a bowl of ramen with friends, and then within the next 30 minutes I would have to make a decision that would directly affect the lives and well-being of millions of people. Pressure? I think so.

So what does everyone think about Obama as the next sex symbol of the first decade of the 2000’s? I think that’s already been established…

That is all. Stay strong in adversity, friends.

what makes it worth the struggle…

I was looking through some pictures on myspace/facebook and I came upon one of my many drunk pictures from vegas. However, after reading Fong’s comment, it immediately made my day.

the pic

THAT’s chang’s signature drunk/ohshit/tv/ahh face!” – Fong

haha, what I would do for a return trip to Taipei… btw, congrats Fong on getting the job! hookups in vegas woot! haha.

recycle me

This may sound very depressing, but right now I feel like an recycled can; not thrown away but people think nothing of re-using you over and over again.

I know you’ll be back… as long as I’m around you’ll be back when I’m usable again.

even though I got a promotion, I feel more like I just lost my job.

what makes a stupid decision… well, stupid?

I’m sure there have been many times in your life when you’ve done something so stupid, that you can only smile and shake your head at your idiocy. I know I have, but what about those friends that always happen to make really stupid decisions. You know who these people are. These are your friends that happen to choose the worst possible path they could take. This is the friend that looks at a fork in the road, and decides to follow the road that has a big fat red warning sign with a picture of a bear on it. They may not even be stupid, this friend could be one of the brightest people you know. They’re just not exactly great at common sense. But I digress.

I don’t believe that stupid people always make stupid decisions. Yes, I do think that everyone does make incredibly dumb choices sometimes, but to each his own. In fact, some of the most intelligent people repeatedly make stupid, and i mean stupid, decisions. A stupid decision is exactly what it is; a decision. However there are exceptions. Personally I think that if you repeat the same mistake more than twice in a row, you’re not making a stupid decision, you might just be an idiot. Intelligence without logic is simply madness.

I could go on and talk about all the people I know and all the stupid things they’ve done, but that would be unfair to them. We all make some stupid choices – financially, emotionally, etc. I think the most stupid things happen when a number of variables mix together to make a simply shit-tacular situation. For example, if you are feeling down, don’t go out and go shop at Nordstrom’s. What could you possibly buy that would make you feel better? (other than some emo pills and a vibrator for the ladies)  If you need to buy a new car, and you know you can’t afford a Mercedes, but you still really really want one, resist the urge! Personally I don’t like the idea of being in debt for the next 10 years.

What makes smart people make constant stupid decisions is their emotions. Emotions block all common sense and logic your brain tries to feed you. Emotions make you add the word ‘but’ to the end of every sentence in an attempt to justify your actions. I’m not saying to be cold and calculating. But you get the idea. (I hope)

Now, don’t think this entry is about you. It is in no way directed at a specific person or group. I like to spread my disbelief evenly . However, collectively, these people and groups make me feel that while I may not be intelligent in academia, I certainly do not lack in common sense.

Simply, stupidity is contagious. Like the common cold and a virus from a zombie movie, it spreads whether your are aware of it or not. Think your smart? Think back over the past month, and count how many ’stupid’ decisions you have made. That’s right, I thought so.

<3 – aaro